Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Randomize
