you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Randomize
