Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
