i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
