can't come. weird drunk guy passed out on couch. long story, tell u later.
wtf. wake him up, call him a cab, get over here!
i just want to make sure he doesn't die. or rob me. plus it's facinating, he's faceplant on the arm of my sofa.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
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she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
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We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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