If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize