Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
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