If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
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