That's intense
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
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