Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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