I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
there is glitter all over my balls
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
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