It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
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He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
50% drunk capacity currently
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I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
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