Where did you get a picture of my penis
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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