In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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