im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
