so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
