Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize