Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Randomize
