This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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