The maid of honor just puked.
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
Randomize
