its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
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