did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Randomize
