Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
β"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
Honestly, you canβt tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP ππππ
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