Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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