I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
