We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
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