just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
