Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
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