he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
