also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
