stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Randomize
