i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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