I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
