Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize
