Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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