how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
I can tuck mytits in my pants
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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