any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
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