wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
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