: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Randomize
