I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
