it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
