If I had a nickel for every time I've used a condom, I'd have... two nickels.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize