I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Randomize
