an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Randomize
