I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
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