they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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