'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Randomize