I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
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Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
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If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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