I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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