I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Randomize
