i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
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I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
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no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
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